If you are feeling lost and stuck in a rut, the best thing to do is to start evaluating what exactly is going on in your life and in your mind.
Ask yourself how you got there and how you can get out.
We all find ourselves on a path far removed from where we would like to be in life at some point in life.
Life sometimes becomes bland, and the things we find ourselves having to do day in and day out become unbearable making us uneasy and unfulfilled.
Being stuck and lost in life is a terrible place to be and one we must do everything we can to leave behind so we can live with passion and joy.
Nothing worse in life than dread waking up every morning to face the same dull unbearable set of circumstances, may it be a job you have, a place you don’t like living at, or a relationship that has lost its spark.
To get yourself unstuck and to find your most amazing and happy cant wait to get up and get started in life, you must as the best questions that will direct you to the life you want.
Getting lost and stuck happens. But staying stuck and lost is no way to live. You must do what it takes to rise like the phoenix from the ashes you are buried in, and therein lays the work.
Remember, ” the secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old but on building the new” – Socrates
So what are the best questions to ask when you feel lost, and stuck? Let’s go ahead and check them out.
The best questions to ask yourself when you feel lost and stuck.
#1 What makes me happy?
To begin the journey of finding yourself when you are feeling lost, you need to know yourself well. And understanding the things that bring you joy is a big part of this process.
So write as many things as possible that bring you joy.
#2 What does my best most ideal day look like?
I love this question. It’s okay to dream of what your ideal day looks like. Because with the right mindset you can achieve it.
Think about your day from the moment you wake up. How are you feeling? What are you excited about?
How will you be spending this day? Is it a day in your ideal place to live? Maybe by the beach or the mountains, in a cabin?
Maybe you are writing your masterpiece, doing work that fulfills you. Write it all down. You see, this is the guide to lead you where you want. So be as prolific as possible.
#3 If I could choose anything to do for a living, what would I choose?
Your job or your means of supporting yourself takes a good chunk of your daily life.
And when you have to bear down and grit your teeth daily to do a job you hate, to be in an environment you abhor, life feels hard.
You feel terribly unhappy and stuck. So ask yourself the type of work you would love to be doing and that would give you joy and fulfillment.
When we like the work we do, work really doesn’t feel like work.
#4 What are my values?
Your values are your guide in choosing a life that makes you feel good. If you have to live in an environment where your values are trampled on or you have to sacrifice what you believe in to fit in or do the work, again you lose a part of yourself.
So let your values be your guide in choosing the work you do, the people you associate with.
That way your world will be in harmony and your mind will feel peaceful and your life happy.
#5 What I am Passionate about? What drives me?
Asking yourself this question will point you towards the life you want to live. Think of the things that just light you up.
It may be a hobby you have. A hobby can turn out to be your career. Do you like to write, knit, speak, educate?
Another way to think about this is what can you never stop talking about?
If you can turn a passion into a career you have it made because you will never work a day in your life. Work will be just so much fun.
#6 What am I grateful for?
Being grateful is important. When you are grateful you stop feeling negative, and that positive attitude is powerful in attracting more joy and happiness.
You have heard of the law of attraction. Being grateful is not telling you to stay just where you are in life. No.
Being grateful helps see what you might otherwise miss and in noticing those details, you may notice your gifts and put them to use as well thereby changing your life.
#7 What am I afraid of and why?
Know and get in touch with your fears. Name them precisely. You don’t want just a vague feeling of unease.
When you know your fears, you can also look for ways to overcome them. them.
#8 If I could live anywhere in the world, where would I choose to live and why?
I am currently struggling with this question. The place you live is important to your happiness.
Sometimes you can feel a sense of displacement, or a feeling of wanting to be someplace else that makes you feel lost.
What are you looking for in the place you want to call home? If I could choose anywhere to live, it would be somewhere where most days are sunny, and I have a blue sky nearly every day.
I don’t know about you but sunny weather simply makes my soul happy.
#9 Who do you admire the most and why?
The people you admire can tell a lot about your aspirations. So this question can tell you the kind of life that would make you happy.
Do you admire a certain person for their financial achievement, career, or their outlook on life, maybe the difference they make in the world? Answer this question to help you outline the life you want.
#10 What dreams do I have?
Sometimes it helps to go back, maybe way back to when you used to dream about the kind of life you wanted to live.
Write down the job/career you dreamed about or still dream about. Who is the kind of person you would like to marry?
Or would you like to marry or not? And if married, what improvement in marriage would you like to be happy if for any reason your marriage makes you feel stuck.
Career and family life are the biggest determiners of our happiness, so looking at these areas deeply will shed some light on the changes you need to be unstuck.
#11 What is the one step I can take today to start changing my circumstances?
Ah, this is such an important question. That one step can be such a determinant in changing your life.
It can be such a tiny step, yet it matters because one tiny step can lead to another and another and bigger steps to follow that will help you find yourself finally.
So choose one step, no matter how small, and start making some changes.
#12 How do I picture my life 5 years from now?
Sit down and write your goals down and visualize your life after you have implemented your goals. How is life? What have you achieved? Where are you living, and who is there with you? How has your life changed?
#13 What habits do I have that may be in my way likely making me feel stuck?
Many of us feel stuck because we have habits that keep us stuck. Do you have habits that you need to stop to move your life forward?
It may be a habit such as procrastination, or big ones like drinking too much. So examine your habits and see where changes are due.
# 14 When Do I feel like my best authentic self?
Being your authentic self is the most liberating feeling there is. Not having to fake who you are is a great way to live and when you decide to let the world know who you truly are and live passionately you will no longer feel stuck. So let go of pretentiousness and embrace your true self.
We suffer so much by trying to please others and living within society imprisoning dictates.
So when do you feel like your most true self? What activities make you feel in touch with your true self?
#15 What is the one thing holding me back?
This is a very crucial question in uncovering why you feel stuck. where the problem is knowing the biggest factor keeping you from going after the life you want will send light to what the biggest problem is. Then from there brainstorm how to solve that issue.
#16 How would I like to be described by others?
When people talk of you, what would you like them to say? Or even how would you like to be seen and remembered for? What achievement do you want to be known for?
#17 What do I feel are my greatest gifts?
We all are endowed with certain gifts. You are great at something. It may be something you do effortlessly another remark on. Notice the things you do well. You can capitalize on these gifts and remake your life.
#18 What skills do I have? Can I use these skills in a new way?
This is more or less like the questions above but this goes to training and education you have, and things you know how to do? Go beyond the traditional ways of using your skills.
Like just because you went to school to be a teacher, and now you hate teaching you don’t have to be stuck as a teacher and hate every waking day of your life. Brainstorm other ways you can use your skills as a teacher.
#19 What difficulties am I facing now? Am I trying hard enough to overcome these obstacles? What is the one thing one small step I can take today?
For this question, list all the difficulties that make it hard for you to achieve the goals that you make you get unstuck and help you find yourself.
Then evaluate what you can do to overcome these obstacles.
Write out one or two steps you can take to remove one of these obstacles.
# 20 What do I like or not like about my job?
Many people go through their lives bearing all manner of things they hate about their jobs. It can help you to list all the things you don’t like about your job and weigh it against what you like.
This way you can decide if you really are better off finding a better job and also look for a job where most of the most offensive things you hate don’t exist.
#21 What relationships do I have that bring me the most joy?
Your relationships are a big determining factor for the level of happiness and fulfillment you feel in your life.
So list your best relationships and why they matter to you. What qualities do your best friends have that you love? What do you love about your other great relationships? This way you can see what really matters to you.
#22 What relationships do I have that stress me out? Can I disengage from these relationships? Do I need to set boundaries to protect my peace?
A bad significant relationship like a marriage you feel unable to leave if it no longer works can make you feel terribly stuck and lost.
The wrong spouse such as a narcissist can disempower you till you forget who you are and what dreams you once had can seem totally impossible. So take to answer this question truthfully.
#23 What actions and behaviors do I have that may be signs of self-sabotage?
For many people who feel stuck and lost in life, self-sabotage can be part of the problem. A lot of the time it is actually a big part of the issue.
You can get so much that your thoughts and mindset dictate your behaviors which then interfere with actions you need to take.
Thoughts like” well, I can’t do that” Or “I am not brave, smart enough, or no one would listen to me or I am not pretty, well-spoken, eloquent,” and the list goes on.
Look at ways you may be self-sabotaging so you can recognize when an action or behavior is an act of self-sabotage.
#24 Are the people in my life I need to forgive?
Sometimes we can keep going over wrongs done to us and relive the hurt over and over. This only hurts you more. And it is another area of life that can keep you feeling stuck.
Forgive but learn the lesson and move on. It takes a weight off your shoulders. You will feel lighter when you don’t carry the weight of past hurts. Don’t let other people’s behavior keep you stuck.
#25 What areas of my life are within my control?
Life is not always fair. There may things in your life that you cant control. Look at the areas you can control and aim to change where change is necessary.
The rest leave to a higher power. We must choose our battles. Remember the Serenity Prayer. This will give you more clarity and sanity.
#26 If money was not a factor, what would I choose to do with my life?
Do you have a dream you want to pursue but the bills keep you stuck? Are you afraid that your dream would interfere with making a living?
We are taught by our society that the biggest thing we need is a job.
Just earn enough money to support yourself and be glad you have a job. You hear things like” you are lucky you have a good job.” No one can seem to understand why you are not happy.
But asking yourself what you would like to do if money was not an issue will open a window to show you the possibility of a happier life.
Look at that possibility and hold on to it. With some effort, you may just be able to reinvent your life.
#27 Am I settling? In what ways or what areas of my life might I be setting?
Many times we settle. We stop fighting for a brighter, life and stop dreaming We are out the light of a life of passion.
We then drift along in life and settle. That is just sad. Look closely at areas you are dissatisfied in. That could be why you feel lost.
Do you think you are settling for a career you don’t like or a relationship that is not good enough? What is not bringing you joy yet you tolerate it?
#28 What am I most proud of in my life?
Sometimes we need a reminder of our own brilliance, bravery. Look back to moments where you overcame something, achieved something you thought hard to do, or others recognized you.
You have done something you are proud of. Write it all down, no matter how small you think others would think it.
You did it. Write it down.
Give yourself some accolades. It is moments like this when you speak greatly of yourself to yourself that can spar other greater even bigger achievements that can move you forward.
#29 Do I love myself? How do I practice self-love?
Practicing self-love is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Self-neglect is the quickest way to lack confidence. And when you lack confidence, being stuck and lost quickly follows.
Take time to show yourself, love. Rest when you need to. Speak up if something is wrong. Eat right. Read this post for more ways to practice self-love.
#30 Who can mentor me in the new direction I want to take my life?
There are many people already doing what you want to do. People who have reached the goals you want to reach.
Find these people. Join groups of like-minded people online. Ask for help and mentorship.
Sometimes you may need to buy a course to find a mentor but when you are determined to reach your goals and find your most passionate self, a bit of investment is worth it.
#31 What are my goals
what goals do you have for your life? What would you like to achieve this week, this month, in the next six months, this year, or in the next five years?
Short-term and long-term goals are important ways to plan your life and where you want it to go so you can truly live a life that makes you happy.
#32 Who are the five people I spend the most time with? Do they inspire me?
Looking closely at the quality of friendships can shed a light as to why you may feel stuck.
If they are not encouraging of the vision you have for your life, or they have no vision beyond mediocre existence, then they may not be the right people to be around.
But if they are ambitious, then learn from them and seek their guidance or encouragement.
#33 Do I need a new friend? What qualities do I need in a friend?
Sometimes loneliness can make us feel lost. We are social animals after all. If you need friends then you have to be intentional in meeting new people.
Join local groups where you live. Groups of people who enjoy the same things you do are a great way to meet new people.
#34 Do I have a gut feeling about my current life and the direction I need my life to go in?
That inner voice we all have but sometimes ignore is a guiding light when we need to make changes in our lives.
It is a quiet voice that nudges you, sometimes warns you. Learn to tune in to this voice.
It comes as a hunch about something. At times is an uneasiness about something. or even a nudging forward and a desire to do something.
Listen to this. Voice. Then write down what you feel the message is. What are you being directed to do?
#35 Do I need to adjust my mindset?
our mindset is determined so much in our lives. Do you have a negative mindset? Are you constantly putting yourself down?
Do you believe the worst of people perhaps only see the worst in all circumstances?
Optimism is such a great way of facing life. Seeing our glass as half full helps us appreciate what we have and in so doing we attack more goodness to us.
To evaluate how you look at life and see if you need to adjust your mindset to be happy.
#36 Do I worry about what people think about me, or the life I want to live, the changes I want to make? What can I do about it?
Now. it is a very strong person who doesn’t worry a bit about what folks think of them.
But feeling derailed to go after what you need to live the life you want by people’s attitude is terrible. But first, write it all down.
What do you think people are 3going to say about your goals. Is this something that should really stop you from going after the life you want? People will talk and then they will move on to the next topic. Live your life.
#37 What do I feel is lacking in my life right now?
Asking this question is a big step towards finding yourself. List everything you think is lacking. This will help you gain clarity. And then from there, you can think of the next steps.
# 38 What am I afraid would happen if I took a chance to make the changes I desire in my life?
In this question, you need to list all your fears? This way you can really get in touch with why you are actually feeling stuck.
When you can name your fears, then you can also look for ways to face those fears.
You can’t fight an unknown enemy. Knowing what you are afraid of is the first step to facing it head-on and conquering it.
#39 Am I lonely? Why? What am I missing and what can I do to feel better?
Answer this honestly. Are you lonely because you are alone? Or are you lonely because you are in the wrong company?
#40 How do my living spaces look like? Do they make me feel at home and at ease? do they bring me joy?
A living space can be inspiring or it can be a mental block. Cluttered spaces cause anxiety and depression.
They make you feel stuck and uninspired. So look around your house. Do you need to organize and clean? If so this will bring you more clarity and joy and inspiration.
#41 Do I spend any time each day doing something I love? Something that inspires me and makes me happy?
Do you spend time every day doing something you love to do? Do you have hobbies and do you engage in them?
Having something healthy every day that makes you happy is a part and parcel of living an inspired life.
Do more of what you love but make sure your hobbies are not detrimental to your goals of becoming a better happier person.
#42 What do I regret the most in my life? What did I learn from that?
Do you have any regrets about the decisions you have made in the past, or things you have done? Why do you regret these things? This can guide you to know what you need to do or not do.
#43 Am I holding onto something I need to let go of?
Holding on to things we should let go of can lead to feeling stuck. At times we hold on to relationships we need to let go of. Now that is a major thing that causes many people to feel lost and stuck.
Sometimes we stay at a job that sucks the life out of us. Another very big thing that can make you feel stuck. Evaluate what you are holding on to and why.
#44 What 3 things would make me happy right now?
List the three things that would make you happy right now. What do you need, or want right now to make you happy?
#45 What do I stand to lose if I make these changes? Is it worth it in the end?
By making the move and making the changes you have thought of what do you stand to lose? Do you feel it is worthwhile?
#46 What do I stand to lose if I don’t make the changes I feel I need?
On the opposite side, what do you stand to lose if you stay where you are and change nothing. Can face yourself every day?