21 powerful ways to be your best self: The ultimate guide

How to be your best self

how to be your best self

Are you striving to be your best self and become the very best version of yourself?

To be your best self requires a realization of your true life purpose, your core values, and the courage to live accordingly because, as this famous quote states;

“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” –Mark Twain

The good news is you can do it. You can become the person you were always meant to be, and live an authentic life.

As you embark on this journey to becoming true to yourself must consider your life in the present moment, and figure out what area of your life you need to change.

Ask the right questions or the important questions.

The answers will lead you to the right path you need to follow.

That said, being your best self is not easy, otherwise, we all would be living happy and productive lives waking up every day excited to start the day. But that is not the case for many, because sometimes you may feel stuck or even lost in life.

And sometimes you get that nagging feeling that life could be better, can be better.

Somehow you feel that you are not living your best life or being the best version of who you want to be.

How to be your best self: Embracing authenticity and growth

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What does it mean to be your best self?

Simply put,  to be your best self is to be your authentic self.

To be your best means showing up as your true self regardless of what others think, or what your parents told you to go after in life.

In essence, to be your best self is to live a life that fills you up.

A life that is authentically you. And truly you know you are being authentic when everything you are doing feels effortless and brings you immense joy.

A life that makes you excited to wake up every morning looking forward to your day unfolding.

It is to live fully with purpose.

It is to live a life that you have fashioned the way you want, listening to that ever-present but albeit quiet voice of life’s north star and guiding light, our intuition.

Being your best self is a dynamic and ongoing process of authenticity, resilience, and continual growth.

It involves embracing your true nature, living in harmony with your values, and accepting both your strengths and imperfections.

This state of being is marked by the ability to face challenges with courage and bounce back from setbacks, using adversity as a catalyst for personal development.

Your best self is characterized by empathy and compassion, extending kindness not only to others but also to yourself.

It thrives on a sense of purpose and meaning, guiding your actions and choices toward fulfilling your deepest aspirations.

Ultimately, being your best self is a holistic journey of self-discovery, self-acceptance, and self-love, leading to a life that is not just successful on external terms but also profoundly satisfying on a soul level.

So in this post, I will give you simple effective steps to take to start living as your best self every day.

And that said, let’s get started.

How to be your best self  and embrace authenticity

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1. Understand your motivation to become your best self

Your desire to change may be driven by two types of motivation- intrinsic motivation and extrinsic forces.

Intrinsic motivation is in my opinion the best driver of change because that comes from real self-awareness and and not for the sake of being admired or recognized by others as it is in extrinsic motivation.

Understanding your motivation is essential in the pursuit of becoming your best self.

It serves as the compass guiding your actions and decisions, providing a clear sense of purpose and direction.

Knowing your motivation clarifies the reasons behind your goals, making them more meaningful and compelling.

This deeper understanding not only fuels your determination but also acts as a source of resilience when faced with challenges.

Furthermore, recognizing your motivation helps you align your aspirations with your core values and beliefs.

It strengthens your commitment to personal growth and empowers you to stay focused on the path of self-improvement.

When you are aware of what truly drives you, you can channel your energy effectively, making your journey towards your best self more purposeful and fulfilling.

Moreover, understanding your motivation fosters a sense of self-awareness and authenticity.

It enables you to differentiate between goals that are genuinely important to you and those influenced by external pressures.

By embracing motivations that resonate with your innermost desires, you create a foundation for sustainable progress, ensuring that your efforts are rooted in genuine passion and conviction.

In essence, knowing your motivation is the key to unlocking your full potential, and guiding you toward a life that is not only successful but also deeply meaningful and true to who you are.

Keep in mind that you can achieve a big change when you implement certain key elements in your everyday life.

Ask yourself some tough questions

To become your best self, it is important to ask yourself a series of important questions to direct your change.

Here is a set of questions to ask yourself when you feel lost and stuck. And these questions on self-love can also give you some guidance.

2. Embrace the fear of failure

When you embrace new challenges and even possible failure you grow. Remember that failure is a good thing sometimes. It helps us grow.

Fear of failure is a natural, albeit daunting, part of the journey towards becoming your best self.

Many great accomplishments and transformative experiences are often preceded by fear and self-doubt. It is in the face of these fears that true resilience and growth emerge.

Embracing the fear of failure is not just important; it is vital in your pursuit of personal development.

Firstly, fear of failure indicates that you are stepping outside your comfort zone.

It signifies that you are challenging yourself and reaching for new heights.

By acknowledging this fear, you are already on the path to growth, for it takes courage to confront your apprehensions. Every failure becomes a lesson, providing valuable insights and paving the way for future success.

When you embrace the fear of failure, you shift your perspective from viewing mistakes as roadblocks to understanding them as stepping stones, propelling you forward on your journey to self-discovery.

Secondly, embracing the fear of failure nurtures resilience. It teaches you how to bounce back from setbacks, fostering mental and emotional strength.

Failure is not the opposite of success; it is a part of it.

Those who have reached the pinnacle of their potential have likely encountered numerous failures along the way. Each failure is an opportunity to learn, adapt, and grow stronger.

When you face failure with courage and resilience, you develop the tenacity needed to overcome obstacles, transforming fear into a powerful motivator for future achievements.

Furthermore, embracing the fear of failure cultivates a mindset of curiosity and experimentation. It encourages you to try new things, explore uncharted territories, and innovate.

When you are not afraid of failing, you are more likely to take risks, leading to new discoveries about yourself and your capabilities.

This fearless attitude opens doors to possibilities that you might never have considered otherwise, enriching your personal and professional experiences.

Embracing the fear of failure is not just about overcoming challenges; it’s about embracing the unknown with open arms.

It’s about acknowledging that failure is a natural part of the journey toward your best self and that each stumble is an opportunity to rise stronger.

When you face your fears head-on, you pave the way for profound personal growth, resilience, and a life that reflects your true potential.

Remember, the path to your best self is not without hurdles, but it’s these very challenges that shape you into the resilient, determined, and extraordinary individual you are destined to be.

Nothing’s sadder than living all your life and realizing you have lived other people’s ideas of you rather than what you should have been doing to live authentically and fully.

Let’s not commit our lives to that fate.  Instead, follow the following steps to live the life you envision.

3. Dont compare yourself to others

Dont get trapped into comparing yourself to your friends or what people post on social media.

Let the better version of you realize that not everything is as it seems.

4.  Leave The Comfort Zone

To be your best self means you learn to leave your comfort zone.

Maintaining the status quo is simply existing and not fully living.

So many dreams die on the altar of the comfort zone.

The comfort zone doesn’t challenge us but it doesn’t move us forward toward our goals and our vision.

Sadly it is hard, very hard to leave the comfort zone, but it can be done.

Simply take one tiny step each day to manifest your dreams. The harder the ideas seem, the harder you should try.

In fact, those things that seem really hard are actually a sign that is exactly what we need to pursue.

5. Visualize The Life You Want

The first step to becoming your best self is to visualize the person you want to be.

It’s important to sit and visualize the life you want to live. See yourself in that better life, See yourself making the changes you need.

Visualize the accomplishments that you would really be proud of.

To live your best life, you must know what you really want out of life. You must have an idea of what your best life would look like.

Just allow yourself to dream. If you woke up to your best life, where are you? What do you have planned for the day?

What career do you have? How are you feeling? Dream away.

Then work towards making this vision a reality.  Come up with a vision board and let your imagination fly.

6. Have a growth mindset 

Embracing your best self is synonymous with lifelong learning and growth.

It requires a growth mindset and a  willingness to learn new things.

And the best part is that when you learn new things it gives you a new sense of confidence and sense of pride.

When you have a growth mindset you are open to positive new experiences, ideas, and perspectives.

It involves a willingness to evolve, to shed old patterns and beliefs that no longer serve you, and to cultivate new ones that align with your authentic self.

Continuous self-improvement is the essence of being your best self.

7. Do the right thing always

Life requires that we make choices many a time.

To be your best self always aim to do the right thing.

Dont let pressure from other people or society lead you to make a choice that doesn’t feel right so as to please others.

Follow those core values and you will never be wrong.

8. Embrace healthy habits

Your future self is determined by your current habits.

Do you have bad habits that you need to stop?

When your habits are in alignment with your goals, you make better decisions that move your life forward in the right direction.

It’s true the most effective way to change is to change your habits.

Maybe you need to exercise more so you have more energy.

Having good habits in your daily life makes you the person you want to be.

If you are struggling with breaking bad habits it’s best to work with a mental health specialist to help you break out of the rut so you can actually be the best person you want to be.

9. Have Goals

A new life requires some new goals.

Having goals and planning is key to moving your life forward.

Goals provide a roadmap for your personal growth journey.

They offer direction, guiding your actions and decisions toward specific achievements.

Goals offer clarity, allowing you to focus your energy and efforts on what truly matters to you.

With well-defined goals, you gain a sense of purpose and motivation, propelling you forward even in the face of challenges.

Goals provide measurable milestones, enabling you to track your progress and celebrate your achievements along the way.

They instill a sense of accountability, encouraging you to stay committed to your aspirations.

Setting and pursuing meaningful goals also fosters a growth mindset, teaching you resilience and perseverance.

When you encounter obstacles, goals act as motivators, inspiring you to overcome hurdles and continue your journey toward self-improvement.

Moreover, having clear goals enhances self-awareness.

It prompts you to reflect on your values, passions, and desires, aligning your ambitions with your authentic self.

As you work towards your goals, you gain a profound understanding of your strengths and areas for development.

In essence, goals are not just destinations; they are transformative tools that empower you to unleash your full potential, making the journey toward your best self a purposeful and rewarding endeavor.

The key is to make sure the goals are realistic and achievable.

So make smart goals that are specific time-bound and realistic.

10. Don’t Procrastinate

So many dreams are killed by procrastination. To be where we need to be we need to follow through.

But to stop procrastinating also need to understand why we procrastinate.

Are we afraid?  Is the work too intimidating? How can we simplify the process?  Are we facing a task we dread?

The best thing is to do it and get it over with.

Remember, doing the most difficult task first creates room in your mind and prevents decision fatigue.

So plan daily to tackle these proverbial frogs and you will feel so much better.

If you struggle with procrastination, this guide will help you overcome procrastination. 

11. Practice Self-Love

Be your best self

​How do you practice yourself? What areas of your life do you need to practice self-love?

To live your best requires self-love. Love all the parts of you inside and out. No one is perfect, yet we spend so much time and money trying to perfect our outward imperfections.

But please note. There is a difference between loathing a part of you and simply loving the way makeup makes you feel.

So if getting all dolled out makes you happy, do it. It is part of self-love. If you can change any outward imperfections to feel your best self, then that is okay too. Go for it.

Living your best life also requires that you practice self-compassion.

Don’t go about beating yourself up when you fall. And yes, we all fall and fail sometimes.

We do stupid things sometimes. Learn from these situations. Every mistake and failure is a lesson.

Take it as such. Give yourself grace knowing that you can do better tomorrow.

12. Stop people pleasing

Do fear saying no? Do you want everyone to love you?

It’s time to leave that behind to become your best self. It may be hard to say no when you are a people pleaser.

But to become your best self you must follow your instincts.

If it feels wrong don’t do it. You need to be in control of your life.

Take charge of your own life regardless of what others think.

13. Embrace Discomfort

When was the last time you did something really difficult. or way beyond your comfort zone?

To become your best self you must be prepared to leave your comfort zone.

On your self-development journey to being your best self, you will encounter many instances where you need to get out of your comfort zone. You will need to learn to embrace discomfort.

You may need to set boundaries to protect your energy and your own happiness sometimes, and that causes many people unease. Most t

You are going to learn new things. All that calls for changes that can be uncomfortable.

 43. Take Responsibility

Being your best self is taking responsibility and ownership of your own life.

If you feel stuck because of what has happened to you in the past, seek help from a mental health professional, or a life coach so you can move on and live life fully.

Take charge and make the changes you need in your life.

Sometimes we blame our family for our life.

And maybe they messed up but try not to get stuck in that. It is very hard, but the lack of action to heal is so much worse. Do the work it takes to heal so you can live your best life.

15. Crush Negative Thoughts And Limiting Beliefs

To be your best self, it’s essential to identify and stop negative thoughts. Your inner world is determined by the quality of your thoughts which determine your feelings and and actions.

First, identify the number one limiting belief that makes you feel stuck.

Our limiting beliefs, our fears, and negative thoughts can keep us mired and stuck in life never moving forward to embrace our full greatness. Yes, you do have greatness within you.

Remember that small quiet voice I mentioned earlier?

Listen to it and you will know what gifts you have.

Our negative thoughts and limiting beliefs lie to us and stop us from achieving our dreams.

This is due to our reptilian brain whose job is to keep us safe and so we gravitate toward limiting beliefs

As a result, we avoid the unfamiliar just in case in that familiar situation we may get hurt.

The key is to take small tiny steps toward the things that matter but you find scary.

Do them anyway.

This will dramatically change your life in ways you would never have imagined.

As for negative thoughts, the more you give them free rein, the more they will torture you.

Learn to refute negative thoughts.

Ask yourself,” Is this really true?” What evidence do I have?”

In many cases, we get blinded by these thoughts that keep us unhappy. If you had an interaction that upset you don’t dwell on it too much.

You may be upset at the moment but don’t let it consume you or blind you.

Don’t generalize it to a certain group of people either.

The trouble with negative thoughts is that they keep you pessimistic.

Unfortunately like attracts like.

Remember the law of attraction? Well, it is real.

Our brain somehow manifests the things we notice more.

So embrace positivity and you find so much more joy in your life.

Positive affirmations are a great way to develop positive thinking and a positive mindset

16. Develop Good Habits

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To become a better person or the best version of yourself, you must recognize your habits for what they are. Habits are powerful.

They can help you achieve your wildest dreams or keep you stuck and even lost.

It’s the little things you do every day that determine your success.  Those tiny habits matter a lot.

Learn and practice the habits of successful people.

Start healthy habits because having a healthy body and mind will get you so much further in life.

Be mindful. Learn to slow down as well and smell the proverbial roses.

Related posts: Best Habits for a Happy Life 

Habits of confident women

17. Keep the right company

Becoming the best version of yourself is not possible if you are in the company of people whose life is not in alignment with your new direction.

Having successful close friends inspires you to make the best of yourself as well.

So choose your friends wisely.

When on a journey toward your best self, you may have to end some relationships if they are not aligned with who you are trying to become.

18. Don’t Totally Depend On Motivation

do you remember the last time you were motivated

When you are trying to be your best self you cannot depend on motivation.

Motivation is a big lie. Just think about all the things you were once motivated to start yet you soon found you had no more motivation to keep going. What happened next?

You abandoned them when motivation waned.

Also, think about how many things you procrastinate on sometimes because, well, you are not motivated right now.

If you want to be your best self bad enough and make real changes in your life, then don’t wait to be motivated.

Commit to doing the things that are important to you starting today.

Waiting until we are motivated can mean waiting forever.

Motivation is just not reliable.

You see, motivation doesn’t last. Mel Robbins says motivation is garbage.

Watch this video to hear from Mel herself why you cannot rely on motivation

Unfortunately, we all think of motivation as this amazing power that drives us to achieve great things.

But the trouble is, that drive is often very short-lived.

Those who achieve great things do not do them on motivation alone.

The best thing is to just start. Start small, keep your goals in sight, and forget motivation because it sure is unreliable.

If the idea we want to pursue is new, we may become intimidated, and the more we wait to be motivated the less motivated we become.

19. Ignore People’s Judgment

be you best self

Don’t let people’s opinions of you discourage you from reaching your goals. Be relentless in the pursuit of your own happiness.

Remember the vision you have for your life. Seek those things that will fulfill you regardless of what other people think or say. It is your own life. You know what matters to you.

20. Have a daily routine

Routines make life easier. They streamline your daily to-dos and your brain loves that.

Having a specific time to do the things you must do daily will make you a happier and more productive person.

You need a night routine as well as a morning routine. You can make it either as simple or as elaborate as you want. In fact, I think the simpler the better.

But when it comes to your sleep routine, be sure to be quite disciplined about how you wind down for bed.

You want to make sure you get to sleep at the same time daily and plan on at least 8 hours of sleep.

Some people can get by with less but find out what works for you.

Avoid the phone and screens two hours before bed to optimize your melatonin production for deeper longer sleep.

When you do this you ensure you will wake up early enough with enough energy to tackle your day.

You will feel awesome and be ready to crush the day’s to-dos.

Be sure your morning routine is streamlined so you are not rushing and getting upset.

Try the best morning habits of high performers to elevate your success.

A good morning routine will ensure you have enough time to shower and eat breakfast at the very least without a crazy rush.

Now if you can afford the extra time, scheduling your exercise, prayers, journaling, and affirmations to your morning routine will make you feel even better. y.

Develop daily routines to help you feel better every day, feel more inspired to go after your goals, and live your best life.

21. Be Helpful To Be Your Best Self

We live in a society and we should live fully as part of society. That means we need to do our part to help where we are able.

If financially able choose a course to support. Volunteer at shelters and help those less fortunate.

Seek political power even if only in local government.

Not so you can have power, but so you can have a voice to change your society in the right direction.

Being your best self also means being a participating and helpful member of society.

So step up and see what needs you can help with in your society, in your world.

And that’s it! That is how you live your best life. That is how to live a happy and totally fulfilled life.

It is taking total unapologetic ownership of your life and being completely real and authentic.

That means it is doing the inner work, self-developing, and being totally real with yourself. It is taking steps and being committed to moving your life in the direction you want.

Try it and start the journey to a life you love and be your best self.

And that’s it, my friend is how to be your best self every day.

Read next: 33 Things I let go of to Be Happy: The Ultimate Guide 

be your best self

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